Flash Addicts Anonymous

Councilor: Group, say hello to our new member!
Group: (dully) Hi.
Me: Hello, group.  I um...I have a problem.
Councilor: And what is this problem, Special New Member?
Me: I have...an addiction...*deep breath* an um...an addiction to flash games! *wince*

This addiction has grown so serious as to cause me to neglect my blog, however few readers' attention it holds.  There should seriously be a Flash Addicts Anonymous group, because these things are dangerously addictive.  http://www.puffgames.com/ should be brought up on charges for negligence and aiding and abetting addicts who can't help themselves. 

Because of puffgames, my fingers twitch from excessive Super Crazy Guitar Maniac Delux 3, the online flash Guitar Hero knockoff.   I press the same keys (asdf and directional arrows) with the song on mute over and over until I finally get a gold star...it bothers me immensely until I do.  Thanks to The Adventures of Fancy Pants Man 1 and 2, I have the strangest desire to play golf via kicking snails and buy ridiculously colorful pants.  Skullkid makes me never want to work in an office.  Ever.  If I do, I'm carrying a semi-auto; that guy's the hardest to kill.  Desktop Tower Defense and Bloons Tower Defense 3 are great time killers for those who are strategy game enthuisists...but not quite good at strategy, like myself.  Boneless is great to just have in the background while surfing Facebook, blogging, balancing your bank account, whatever.

You know what's also great to run in the background? Pandemic 2 (I haven't played Pandemic 1).  It's fantastic for multitasking; I'm even playing it right now.  It's disturbingly addictive and I've got the strongest urge to kill all of Madagascar.  Seriously, it won't get infected.  Ever.  On the leader board, one person even named their disease "Madagascar must DIE!" it is THAT hard to kill.  Twice now I've killed the entire world...except Madagascar. 

I suppose I should explain what the whole game is about, shouldn't I?  You get your own disease; you can pick virus, bacteria, or parasite.  I personally suggest parasite because I've had the largest success rate with it.  You can name your disease and pick out symptoms.  Each symptom, however, has a price.  As your disease takes over the world and infects and kills people, you earn points.  These points going to buying symptoms, transmission types (rodent, insect, water, and air), and resistances (cold, heat, moisture, and drug with four levels of resistance).  As the game progresses it takes longer to earn points, which is what makes it great to just play in the background (not on realistic, however).  It's strangely cathardic, watching as each government closes its borders, starts burning bodies, shuts down airports, hospitals, and shipyards.  You don't win, however, unless you kill the entire planet.  Madagascar is so easily spooked, it's almost impossible to kill.  Last night, I even had a dream about infecting that God-forsaken island.

So yes, that's where I've been.  Other time wasters I approve of? http://www.cracked.com/, http://www.deargirlsaboveme.com/ , Head Trip comics , and http://www.notalwaysright.com/ .